


When love and hate collide

by Croliv_writes



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Biting, Kissing, M/M, Rough Sex, THEY DESERVE IT, Tattoos, Touching, death and beyond, the astrals are assholes, the game is tragic enough, there will be fluff in the end
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-28
Updated: 2017-11-08
Packaged: 2018-12-08 05:17:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 15,287
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11639694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Croliv_writes/pseuds/Croliv_writes
Summary: Hating Noctis was easy, wanting him not so, but what Ardyn and Noctis do in this ruined world. One last night together before it all comes to an end wouldn't hurt anyone.And the beyond awaited both Kings and a damaged soul could finally start to heal with the help of another(The translation of "I hate that I want you", title changed to fit for later)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, okay. I finally managed to translate it on my own. And the dear [Eowyn (eowynmusings)](http://archiveofourown.org/users/eowynsmusings) beta'd this monstrum again and made it readable. It is something different to just write a fic and then translating my own...Phew. And I actually never intended on writing more to this one-shot, which by now isn't one anymore...
> 
>    
> The name has changed by now and is more fitting for the way it will be going.
> 
>  
> 
> [The german one](http://archiveofourown.org/works/9823511)

Hatred  was hardly the right  word to describe  the feelings he harboured for the  one who  was to save the world. The comrades of the Chosen King lay unconscious on the the ground of the throne room, thanks to his magic. Blue eyes stared angrily up at him, nearly sparking flames. Yet there was another, deeper feeling and Ardyn hated that more than the man standing at the stairs.

He  hated that he wanted Noctis so much. It burned him from the inside out, nearly  making him  lose the rest of his sanity until his only thoughts were to touch Noctis, to fuck him until they both didn't know who they were or what their damned fate was. The daemons inside of him scratched at the surface, their constant murmur and growling his  only companions.

And Ardyn wanted silence for one precious moment at least  \- blissful silence.

Ardyn sighed dramatically, tilting his head ever so slightly. He knew that Noctis felt the same. Both men standing there, waiting for the other to make the first move.

"Oh, the Astrals can be _so_ cruel," Ardyn said, his lips twitching into a bitter smile. He warped to the last king of Lucis and grabbed him by his throat, ignoring his croaking and gasping for so much needed air. With the other hand he carded softly through raven locks.

"Ardyn." Noctis breathed and one hand gripped his wrist. Noctis' air got cut off more and more, his face turning slowly red, voice breaking. "Ardyn, ple-"

He could feel the pulse under his fingertips and he could strangle  Noctis right here and now or break his neck. It would be over so fast. Too fast.

Lips pressed hard onto those of the King of Light,  his hand slowly easing his grip around  Noctis’ throat, leaving angry red marks. With both hands he cradled  Noctis’  face. Thumbs stroked softly over his cheeks, a stark contrast to Ardyn’s demanding kiss and aggressive demeanor. Ardyn released Noctis for a moment, for a lone single breath,  then he was kissing him again with such f ervour that Noctis felt a bit dizzy in the head.

The Chosen One's hands sneaked  around the taller man’s neck and one gripped the auburn hair tight. A moan escaped him, swallowed  by Ardyn, who released a similar sound. The immortal pressed himself and especially his hips against Noctis', who gasped as he felt  _ how _ hard Ardyn was.

"Ten years, Noctis. You've kept me waiting for ten  _ long _ years." He whispered into the ear of the raven haired man,  biting Noctis’ earlobe lightly and growling low in his throat. And he felt how Noctis shuddered from this sound. "Oh,  _ Noctis _ ."

With some satisfaction and a small smirk on his lips he felt how Noctis slowly grew hard and how he pressed his hips against the Accursed  One's . Both sighed, but this wasn't enough. 

"Ardyn, why are you doing this?" Noctis finally asked and Ardyn stepped back fast, making Noctis stumble in surprise. He stared at Ardyn.

A small laugh escaped the older man as he gazed at the Chosen King, Noctis’ whole appearance a delight and a sight to behold.  Hair a bit ruffled, lips swollen and a soft hue of red on his cheeks, but the tent in  his pants was evidence enough  of what Noctis truly wanted. The man swallowed, trying to regain some dignity.

" It is s imple, Noctis. I want  _ you _ , " Ardyn declared, looking him straight into his eyes.

The ten years beauty sleep had  truly made a man out of the bratty little princeling. A man that could be called king. He looked more regal and in his blue eyes  lay  a deep sadness and tiredness, which Ardyn knew all too well, but also such strong determination. Nothing was left of the boyish youth and features, just strong  and  hard ones.

He stepped up to Noctis.  The Chosen  One  breathed hard through his nose and avoided the intense gaze out of amber eyes. “Simple? It is simple, yes?! We...are enemies. We shouldn't be doing  this !” Noct’s voice was filled with anger, but nearly broke at the end of his sentence,  now glaring at Ardyn.

Who narrowed his eyes, hand touching Noctis throat again. “But…” He murmured and his other hand rubbed over Noctis’ crotch. “You seem very eager, my dear.” He bent down and kissed Noctis again, biting into his lip and pressed Noctis flush against his body.

Then he practically dragged Noctis out of the Throne Room,  destroying the illusions of the chained up corpses of Iedolas, Regis, Luna and Nyx with a flick of his wrist . Noctis wanted to protest and wriggle himself out of Ardyn's grip, but his grip turned tighter, almost breaking Noctis’ wrist in the process.

Stopping in the middle of the antechamber, surrounded by all those old paintings depicting the history of the Astrals, Ardyn pressed Noctis against his body until all protests of the man had nearly died away and the Chosen One stole a kiss, dipping his tongue into Ardyn's slightly open mouth. Ardyn reciprocated this rather passionate kiss, smiling and dominating the kiss and had Noctis moaning oh so beautifully into it. He had the feeling that he could feel the power of the Crystal, could even taste it on his tongue. It seemed as if the power was pulsing under Noctis’ skin, very much like his own darkness was.

“You should have been  in  one of those paintings , ” Noctis mumbled, sad tone swinging in his voice. Ardyn simply watched him,  fingers stroking Noctis’ cheek.

“And yet the world forgot me.”

Then he walked  to the elevators, Noctis in tow,  pushing one of the buttons that would bring them to the chambers of the royal family.

Ardyn  simply couldn't keep his hands off of Noctis and touched him on his arm, side or back, fingers sliding up and down and Noctis let it happen, the only reaction a few gasps or  him leaning slightly into the touch. Oh, how easy it would be to harm Noctis or mark him in certain ways, but for this there would be more than enough time.

Ardyn hummed low, stroking softly over Noctis pale neck, over his pulse and simply watched him, small smile dancing on his lips.

The elevator came to a halt and with a ping the doors slid open.

“It would be fitting, if we are consuming our lust in the chambers of the king. We are worthy enough, aren’t we?” Ardyn whispered, the word  _ worthy  _ dripping with mockery. Noctis closed his eyes for a brief moment and then walked in front of Ardyn, who followed him swiftly.

“If you say so,”  Noct replied almost bored and Ardyn sighed theatrically, as if  Noctis’ lack of concern was an insult to Ardyn. When the big black wooden doors came in sight , Ardyn  placed his arms around the younger king from behind, letting him feel once more how much he wanted him.

Noctis tensed up, quite involuntarily, breathing  deeply; in through his nose and out through his mouth . It ended in contented small sigh. He could feel that Ardyn was well...endowed and he knew  their sexual affair wouldn't be without some pain. Ardyn was right about one thing : Noctis wanted him, despite them being enemies and  the fact that he should hate him. Lust pulsed through him, growing stronger with every passing minute and the hate he held for Ardyn subsided - if he had ever hated him  at all . Ten years spent in the Crystal had changed his views on his life and the things that had happened and would happen , and some events now seemed dull and meaningless.

Noctis then pushed  the doors open  and entered the large room with windows that went from the floor to the ceiling. They stood in the living room of the king’s chambers and another dark wooden door on the opposite side led to the bedroom. The interior was all in black: walls, floor and the ceiling, typical for the lucian royal blood. The floor was entirely made out of black marble with small delicate silver lines running through  it in a  weblike  pattern,  and black and dark grey carpets lay on the floor too.

And it wasn't dirty or dusty.

“It is so...tidy here.” Noctis said and looked over his shoulder at Ardyn, who just gazed at him with that nerve racking smile again - and with a hunger in his eyes that made Noct shiver and get  goosebumps . He looked away again and around, while Ardyn laughed softly. 

It seemed as  if  someone  was living here. 

Oh.

Ardyn slowly opened Noctis’ jacket and threw it carelessly onto the couch. “Well,  _ I  _ live here. Did you really  think  I would  sit on the throne these past ten years ? I am still a man that loves comfort and luxury...and a soft comfortable bed.”

Noctis was silent. Every touch of the other man should be disgusting him, but he really embraced them because nobody had dared to touch him that way before. He was after all the prince and now king and many had avoided his personal space and kept their distance. They assumed he was a  man that  didn’t really  like to be touched, but he actually craved it.  Except his friends, but they had kept their touches and half hugs to a friendly , brotherly level.

Now - now the Chosen One craved it, feeling Ardyn's lips on his neck and he tilted his head to the side to give him more room.

“So needy.” Ardyn murmured and smiled, pressing his lips time and time again  to  the soft skin, dragging his teeth over  it  and in the end biting lightly into  the young king’s neck. Noctis moaned low and leaned against Ardyn, who fumbled with his black vest and opened the buttons at a fast pace. That piece of  clothing, too, found his place on the couch. Ardyn slowly started pushing Noctis into the general direction of the bedroom.

“Ardyn.” Noctis mumbled, half turning to Ardyn, slipping his hands underneath his coat and pushing it down from his shoulders. It fell to the floor with a loud thud and the man chuckled low, grabbing Noctis’ chin rather  harshly  and  clicked with his tongue, annoyed .

“I didn't say you could  do that, but if you’re so eager to see me naked I won’t  complain,”  he whispered and his gaze dragged down Noctis’ body. Ardyn tugged at his red scarf and threw it to his coat. “Still…”

“And if I disobey you?” Noctis asked, a challenging glint in his blue eyes.

Ardyn smiled sweetly and placed his hands on Noctis’  waist, fingers digging into Noctis’ flesh until he bared his teeth. “Then you will be punished.” 

The Immortal Accursed pushed Noctis through the door and onto the bed,  pressing him into the mattress with his whole weight . Once, twice Ardyn  thrust  his hips against Noctis, both men groaning at the more than needed and welcomed friction.  And as fast he had laid himself onto Noctis, as fast he stood again at the side of the bed. Noctis growled in frustration and dug his fingers into the black  bedsheets .

“Noctis, come  here,” he said quietly and Noctis lifted his head,  wanting to protest at first and not obeying again, but in the end  he slid to the edge of the bed, looking up at the other male. Ardyn pulled on Noctis’ tie until it loosened and dragged him onto his feet. Again he kissed Noctis, popping the buttons of his shirt open and peeling him out of it.

His fingers trailed over Noctis’ right arm, over Ramuh’s tattoo. Jagged strokes and lines, lightning strikes woven into  one another and old symbols and runes, which contained Ramuh's blessing, adorned his arm. The touch was electrifying and Ardyn stared at the tattoo, pressing harder on it, scratching over Noctis’ skin. Then he pressed his lips onto his shoulder where the tattoo began and  moved down his arm. Noctis just watched  this and  breathed harder, feeling his own magic well up and how Ramuh’s own pulsed through his arm, sometimes stronger and sometimes  too faint to notice it.

Ardyn threw Noctis a sidelong glance, trailed his hand over the Chosen  One’s back . The same thing happened and the power and magic within tattoos of the Astrals burned bright when Ardyn touched them. He stroked over Noctis whole back and placed his hand on his lower back, pressing his fingers into the flesh.

“Hmm, where  might the other places be ?”  he  hummed , not expecting an answer from Noctis. Ardyn simply took  Noctis’  pants and underwear  off,  tossing them onto the floor. On Noctis’ hips were the blessings of Shiva and the sign of Ifrit. Shiva’s  on the right hip and thigh, tightly woven white lines, ice crystals and snowflakes while Ifrit’s trailed  along the other hip and over his left thigh and the inner part. Flickering flames a nd ancient  words etched red into the skin.

Again he scratched and stroked his fingers over them, kneeling down and sinking his teeth into his right hip, kissing the abused skin afterwards. Ardyn was so close where Noctis wanted to be touched the most right now, but the man ignored his hard flesh.

“Ardyn…” Noctis said quietly and his voice sounded heavy and strained. Oh, what a lovely sound that was!

“Tsk. Tsk. Just wait. I’ll get there, my dear , ” Ardyn promised him and looked up into those blue orbs. “Lay on your stomach.”

Noctis kicked his pants and shoes away und let himself flop onto the bed, sighing as the cool fabric hit his skin. He pressed his hips into the mattress and gasped. Ardyn's gaze hung on Noct's ankles ; curled around them  was Leviathan’s blessing. Deep blue curvy and wavy lines, intricate and woven into each other as well. He trailed his fingers over them and Noctis shivered. Then a heavy weight came to rest on Noctis and hot breath ghosted over his shoulder , the fabric of Ardyn's clothes touching his skin as he moved. A bit unfair in Noctis’ eyes.

Ardyn's warm hands stroked over his back, the man sitting up to get a better look at Titan’s tattoo. In the dim light the dark lines seemed to shine on the pale skin of the Chosen. “The whole back…” The  Immortal  murmured and bend down, biting into Noct's shoulder blade, slowly  moving  down and leaving a trail of kisses and bite marks in his wake. His fingers dug into the skin,  tracing  the numerous lines and muscles shifted under the touch  as  Noctis moaned into the sheets.

Ardyn gazed down on  Noctis’  ass and stopped dead in his tracks. Maybe it was the first time, that the man was utterly speechless. He raised an eyebrow and then started to laugh, the sound so sudden and  unexpected that  Noctis looked , confused and surprised , over his shoulder at Ardyn. Ardyn's shoulders shook and only after a while he regained control of himself, grinning devilishly.

“A truly unusual place…” Ardyn said and pinched  Noct's ass with both hands ,  following the straight lines and jagged ones that formed swords and the runes with his fingers . “What  did Bahamut have  in mind?”

“ How should I know? Maybe he has some kind of fetish or so…” Noct murmured into the pillow. Ardyn  began  to knead his  beautifully  shaped ass,  and  couldn't help himself leaving some bite marks and Noctis arched off the bed, stifling a moan.

Ardyn smirked, before he placed a kiss on his tailbone and trailed over Noct's cleft with his tongue. Noctis tensed up, the bed sheets crumbling when he gripped them tight and gasped loudly.

Again Ardyn repeated the motion, circling the ring of muscle and  pushing his tongue into Noctis.  The young king  suppressed his needy sounds and a part of him wanted to scramble away from Ardyn, but the  Immortal’s hands grabbed him by the hips and held him in place. It felt strange and the raven haired man didn't know how to react, but at the same time he just wanted  _ more _ .

Ardyn hummed, leaning back and looking at Noctis. Noctis breathed hard and pressed his cheek into the cool fabric, looking now at the other male.

“You’re still wearing your clothes.” Noctis commented and  a crooked smile spread across Ardyn's lips. “It would be just  _ fair _ …”

“Then do please look away. After all it should be a surprise.” Ardyn purred and waited until Noctis had turned his face away. Noct only heard the rustling of clothes and how  they  fell to the ground.

Then Ardyn laid  down on top of Noctis, both shuddering at the feeling of skin on skin and it seemed that magic sparked up. Ardyn pressed his lips  to  Noctis neck, pushing his cock against his ass and chuckled low.

“Where are your blessings… your marks?” Noctis asked rather reluctantly and bit his bottom lip. The Immortal Accursed just laughed quietly. He gripped Noctis’ wrist, lifting himself a bit up and trailed Noctis fingers over the mark that once had bound him to Bahamut, which went around his navel and traveled a bit south. Even if the covenant between Ardyn and Bahamut was broken, could Noctis feel a tingling in his fingertips - the magic of Ardyn and his own  pouring  into the tattoo.

“That's...also an unusual place…” Noctis only mumbled and wanted to take his hand back.

“The gods seem to love cruel jokes.” Ardyn let go of Noctis’ wrist to place his hand on his hip again. He pressed himself against Noctis  once more and just wanted to thrust into that beautiful body. Ardyn's breath was ragged too, his voice dropping. “Ah, you’re still a virgin…”

Leaning over  to the nightstand next to the bed he rummaged through the drawer until he found what he had searched  for \-  a bottle of oil. It had its advantages that a small part of mankind still tried to survive in this world of ruin. Oil and such things wouldn't cease to exist.

Pouring some oil into his hands he rubbed them together to warm the oil up a bit, stroking over one ass cheek with one hand and lightly slapping it, while his finger circled the ring of muscle and slowly pushed in. It was a delight and Noctis gasped for air and tensed around Ardyn's finger. The man rubbed over Noctis’ lower back, pushing his finger in and out, savouring the moans Noctis made. They were the most beautiful sounds. After a while he added a second finger, scissoring them, and Noctis kept moaning and gasping and Ardyn's cock twitched. What lovely noises and Ardyn could listen to them forever.

“Soon.” Ardyn purred,  now pushing a third finger in and Noctis moaned louder. Then he pulled his fingers out and slicked himself up, positioning his cock. His fingers dug into Noctis hips, bruising the  oh  so pale skin. Finally and slowly he pushed into that heat and Noctis tensed up again, whining low in his throat. Ardyn leaned down, pressing his lips between Noct's shoulder blades onto his spine, licking over sweaty skin. “Shh. It will get better. Trust me.”

Noctis just huffed and to Ardyn's surprise the other male pressed back and took his cock deeper in. Ardyn growled and something in him snapped. With a hard and fast thrust he sheathed himself fully  within Noctis who just let out a small cry.

For a few moments Ardyn held completely still to savour the feeling of Noct's tight heat around him and his shivering body, hands rubbing over his back and shoulders in a comforting manner. A rather loud moan escaped his lips as he nearly slid out of Noct just to thrust back into him. It felt so right and was exactly what Ardyn had desired for so long.

Teeth found  the soft skin and flesh of Noctis’ shoulder again , biting and kissing his way up to his neck. A slow and deep rhythm was set and Ardyn wanted Noctis to  _ really _ feel the slide of his cock in and out of him. After a while Noctis tried to match that pace, moaning and gasping.

“So tight, King Noctis.” Ardyn whispered into Noctis’ ear, chuckling lightly. “It is even better than I imagined. Oh,  _ Noct _ .”

But Ardyn wanted to see Noct’s face, how it contorted in pleasure and pain alike, making him beg for more. He slipped out and whispered into the man’s ear to turn onto his back. Amber eyes meet blue ones. Pupils dilated and eyes darkened with lust.

Ardyn simply kissed him, biting down onto the bottom lip until he broke the skin, tasting blood, and slammed back into  Noctis,  who now clung to Ardyn, wrapping his legs and arms around  the Immortal . Fingers scratched over Ardyn's shoulders and Noct had to feel the scarred blessing of Titan underneath his fingertips. Ardyn licked over the bleeding lip, savouring the coppery taste of the blood on his tongue. Noctis stared at Ardyn with a  mixture of  lust and confusion, unconsciously licking over his bloody lip.

His fingers dug into Ardyn's shoulder now,  hand he dragged them down over his back, leaving burning marks in his wake. The older male just sighed and fucked Noctis hard and fast. Time and time again one of them moaned and Noctis especially  loudly when Ardyn hit his prostate.  Now, Ardyn was concentrating on the task of doing  this time and again.

“Ardyn...ah , ” Noctis  began , but whatever he wanted to say ended in a low moan. He turned his head to the side and licked the blood away from his lips again. Ardyn watched him, his pale neck which  begged to be lavished and  so he did, kissing and biting him. His hands trailed over Noctis’ hips and  sides . A part of him wanted to slam his hand through Noctis chest, holding his heart in his hand and simply crushing it. More blood, more pain to make it truly unforgettable, but Ardyn still held the reins in his mind.

“No one can give it to you like I do , ” Ardyn whispered into his ear, underlining every word with a deep thrust. “No one! Not your dear little friends… Or your  fiancée .” 

Then Ardyn looked into Noctis’ blue eyes, which glared unamused and  angrily  at him. But Ardyn placed a hand on Noctis’ cheek and he leaned into the touch, half closing his eyes.

“You’ll never forget this, Noctis.”

Ardyn picked up his pace, thrusting with abandon into the last  King  of Lucis. There was no room for words left, not even for Ardyn, who would have driven Noctis insane with lewd whispered comments. Only the name of the other fell from their lips on occasion. One spoken with something akin to hope and craving. The other begging and lusting. The  Immortal  placed his elbows on each side of  Noctis,  head, gaze never leaving Noctis’ face.

“I…” Noctis gasped, hand buried into auburn hair. “I’m coming. Please, Ardyn!”

A passionate kiss was pressed  to  Noct's lips as  Ardyn took his cock and pumped in time with his thrusts. Noctis moaned deliciously, tugging lightly at Ardyn's hair. Magic pulsed between them binding them tighter together.

Both their fates were irrevocably woven together and their building bond only  tightened .

They would both die and erase the mistake of the Gods.

“Noctis.” Ardyn murmured and gazed at the man with lust clouded eyes. “Come for me, oh King of Light!” He set a torturous pace, slow, too slow and too tight. Noctis moved with Ardyn's hand, pushing into it, and tugged at his violet locks and Ardyn growled, pressing his lips against Noct's again. He licked over his bottom lip, pushing his tongue inside and savoured this moment. He now pumped his hand faster, all the while he thrust into Noct's oh so willing body with abandon. Noct's cock twitched in his hand.

With a moan that could have been the name of the  fallen  king,  Noctis came in Ardyn's hand, spurting his seed on his stomach. Ardyn groaned when Noctis clenched down around his erection, making the slide of his cock harder, but so more intense. He wouldn't last for long and  thrust  a few more times hard and  deep, making Noctis moan  loudly .

His orgasm crashed over Ardyn, g ranting him beautiful silence  inside  his head, as he shot his seed deep into Noctis, filling his lover with it. He rode it out with small thrusts of his hip. Noctis sighed, his hands trailing over Ardyn's neck and he cradled the face of the  Immortal . Both men needed a few moments to get their breathing under control again.

Ardyn leaned down to steel a few more kisses from those beautiful swollen and sinful lips - out of sheer sentimentality. Not because he felt - in a twisted and  wicked way - something for Noctis.  _ That _ would be fatal.

Hatred . On this the Immortal could count and concentrate.

Noctis fingers  stroked over Ardyn's cheeks, neck and shoulders in a loving way , as if they were almost lovers.

“Does it help?” Noctis mumbled between kisses, nipping at Ardyn’s lips. “Does it bring silence? Quiet?”

Ardyn still was still inside Noctis and slid in slow and deep motions in and out. Noctis tilted his head  back  and shuddered, whispering Ardyn's name as if it was the most beautiful malediction.

The Immortal closed his eyes and savoured this moment of total silence in his head - no constant murmuring, be it from the masses of daemons or the one and only god that would still heed Ardyn's call - although the Infernian was now dead. He slipped out of Noctis, rolling off of him and laying beside him, watching.

“It does. And what about our majesty? Are the  gods’  voices silent, shocked over this most  carnal  act? That you  lay  with the fallen King?” Ardyn teased and the corner of his lips lifted into a mocking smile, but he sobered quickly, placing a hand on Noctis chest, where he could feel his heartbeat.

It seemed as if time had stopped around them. Not even one of the daemons deep down in the belly of the citadel dared to make a noise.

“Yeah. They are quiet.  Not  demanding to end my life…” Noctis mumbled and looked up at the ceiling, grabbing Ardyn’s hand.

“I want your heart, Noctis. Your life.” Ardyn said quietly and stared at Noctis’ profile, the straight nose, the form of his lips and the soft beard. Ardyn pressed his fingers into Noctis flesh, nearly breaking the skin and Noctis face contorted in pain.

But he made no move to push the hand of the Immortal away, stroking  over the back of his hand with a thumb .

The former Chancellor smiled and took his hand away, looking satisfied at the red pressure marks on pale skin.

Noctis took a deep breath and suddenly rolled on top of Ardyn, straddling his hips. “ Soon,” he promised Ardyn and sat up, blue eyes roaming over Ardyn's body appreciatively. “Let me live at least a little bit more. To feel. To enjoy.”

Ardyn placed his hands on the slender hips of the man, raised and eyebrow and  simply  said with a small l augh, “ One last time indulging in pleasure?” His fingers danced over his thighs and he could watch how Noctis grew hard again.

Ardyn too shared that sentiment and he didn't even need to do  anything  anymore, because Noctis lifted himself up and sat down on his length, taking him in again into the welcoming heat. The Chosen One tilted his head back and both men  sighed contentedly . Again he gripped Noctis’ hips and  stroked over the blessing marks with his thumbs; one tingled ice cold, the other burning hot.

“Oh, Noct, you really are a very greedy man.”

“Just shut the fuck up , ” Noctis growled and set a brutal pace.

 

* * *

There was silence between the two kings while they dressed again. It wasn't in any way uncomfortable and every now and then Noctis stole a glance at Ardyn's body.

The man was attractive and well  built , something one would never guess with all the layers the man wore. The blessings of the Six,  though not the one of the Infernian, were scarred and  faded  \- a  sign that  they had broken the Covenant and had pushed him away when he had fulfilled his duty. Used like a doll no one wanted to play with anymore, because it was broken and destroyed.

And Ardyn too eyed up Noctis, his amber eyes roaming over Noctis’ figure. He didn't hide how much Noct's physical form appealed  to him and he nodded at the Chosen with a small smirk.

As if what they had done in bed  wasn't  enough proof, Ardyn wore, much like Noctis, the visible marks, bite wounds and scratches. He willed the daemons down to not heal them, the scratching and growling and murmur slowly returning, the wish to break out and free of this too small fleshly vessel to plunge the world deeper into darkness and chaos. Ardyn straightened his cream coloured shirt and then sat down on the bed to put on his boots.

He noticed Noctis’ searching gaze and threw  Noct’s crumpled shirt at the King, who  caught it in a fluid and graceful motion.

Then Ardyn stood and walked up to Noctis, taking his face between his hands and gazed at him.

“Do you feel regret?”  he  asked low and quiet. Noctis gaze flitted over his features,  then he  stood on his toes to press a quick kiss  to Ardyn’s lips.

“No,” was the simple answer of the Chosen. Why should he regret something he had ultimately really enjoyed? Something he, without saying it to the other, would do gladly again, even if their fates had been different.

Then Noctis stepped back and disappeared into the living room to put on his vest and jacket. Ardyn watched him go, touching his lips with his fingers. He didn't regret it either, and just like Noctis had given into his longing and desire. Still hatred \- of himself and Noctis - and another feeling he didn't dare to name or think about welled up inside of his chest. Emotions so close that they mingled and he couldn't separate them anymore.

It was dangerous to follow that train of  thought  further, but he Immortal Accursed was a masochist. He walked on the edge and threatened to fall into the wrong direction. It wouldn't change anything, nothing, only that his  death  at  Noctis’ hands  would be bittersweet for the both of them. His heart couldn't hold such emotions anymore. The daemons kept tainting him further in this way - at least that  was  what he tried to tell himself.

He put on his vest and followed Noctis with a shake of his head.

He found  the young king standing at one of the windows, looking down at the fallen Insomnia, the light of the moon casting him in pale green  light, thanks to the particle of the Scourge in the sky. It almost looked like one of the paintings of old, a king lost in his thoughts and Ardyn stood in the door and watched him for a while, before he got his scarf and coat and put them both on. The Chosen One turned to Ardyn and there was a glint in his eyes Ardyn couldn't discern.

Was it understanding? Sympathy? Pity?

The latter he didn't want from anyone. He wasn't a creature that needed to be pitied. It would do nothing.

“ Oh King.” Ardyn started, slowly walked up to Noctis like predator that had  its prey backed up  in a corner. “It is time.” Close he stood in front of Noct, looking at him and taking his chin between his thumb and index finger with a bit too much force.

Both men froze, as they heard the ruckus and the voices of Noctis’ friends in front of the door. Mere seconds later the door was violently pushed open and the three scanned the room for their occupants and upon seeing them , their gazes fixed on Noctis and Ardyn.

“Noct!” Prompto called out and wanted to run  to him, but Noctis lifted his hand up and erected a crystal barrier between himself and his  friends that was indestructible. His lips formed a silent apology. Prompto hammered against the barely visible magical wall and Gladio even swung his sword against it. It banged off of it with a loud sound and the Shield was thrown backwards.

“Noctis!” Gladio growled and narrowed his eyes at this behaviour and the very intimate closeness of Noctis and that monster.

Ardyn turned Noctis chin, so that they were facing each other again, and kissed him deeply. It almost felt like this was their last kiss. The Immortal lifted his arm and summoned  his mace and smashed the window. Shards flew around them, but neither of the two kings cared. Not even when a few of them hurt them, the sharp edges cutting their skin.

Gladio and Prompto cried out in disbelief, while their blind friend asked what was going on. One them mumbled the answer and Ardyn smirked.

Yes, he had  tainted pure Noctis, the King of Light.

“Let us begin, Noct ,” Ardyn mumbled, wrapping one arm around Noctis waist, pressing the  oh so familiar body against his.

“No , ” Noctis disagreed and looked him deep in the eyes. “Let’s end this.”

With that the Chosen threw himself and the Immortal Accursed out of the window, the terrified screams and the sound of weapons banging against the magical barrier reaching his ear past the rushing wind.

 

* * *

Pain erupted in his chest, daemons screaming loudly and he felt again. Noctis wrenched the sword out of his chest. He pressed his hand against the wound that didn't start to heal.

“Look at that… The father’s sword in the son’s hand , ” Ardyn said slowly, going down on one knee and then fell backwards.

Rain drummed on him. How fitting, he thought.  Did the ruined world  cry  for him? Or because of happiness that the darkness would be finally banished from the world?

He kept his gaze toward the sky, it was the easiest thing to do at the moment, when he felt how the energy left him and the daemons fought against the light and the power  of the Crystal. Fighting against vanishing out of this world.

“It is over, King Noctis.” Ardyn whispered and saw  from the corner of his eyes how Noctis knelt beside him. Any scorn and mockery was missing in his tone. There wasn't a reason anymore to taunt Noctis. “Banish the darkness and bring back peace to world, while I will be forgotten once more.”

With strenuous effort he turned his head to face Noctis and looked him in the eyes.  There was so much sadness in them, and it made the man look like the twenty year old prince again. So many things left unsaid, bad ones, insults, but also confessions and wishes.

“But… this time you will find peace.” Noctis assured him and leaned over him, protecting him a bit from the rain, which fell down cooling on Ardyn, Noctis and the world. “Close your eyes. You won't need to open them anymore.”

His voice sounded calming, soothing and yet so infinitely sad.

Ardyn didn't want to tear his gaze away from Noctis, but still flitted back to the dark sky. A small smile turned the corner of his lips upwards, as he felt his so longed-for death approaching.  Cold crawled up his limbs and he closed his eyes, his eyelids feeling heavy so suddenly and it was so much easier.

Warmth surrounded him one last time, Noctis grabbed his hand and squeezed it.

“I’ll await you in the Beyond, Noctis , ” Ardyn whispered and a genuine smile formed on his lips.

The last thing Ardyn felt was Noctis’ lips on his and how the man poured an unnamed emotion into the kiss.

Oh, how much Ardyn hated himself for loving Noctis.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, the second chapter. I really write this as I go, so I have no idea what will happen or how or what obstacles I will put in Noctis' and Ardyn's way.
> 
> But everyone will get some attention. There will be even a few kings and queens introduced, later that is.
> 
> Thanks at Eowyn again for beta'ing this. The rest of the story is for you ♥

Noctis woke with a gasp, looking around wildly. He was…floating? In utter darkness on top of that. Wherever his gaze strayed he couldn't make out a difference in the eerie blackness. Strangely enough as he tried to  stand,  he felt solid ground underneath his feet. 

He tried to remember what had happened, but his brain was a mess and his memories only just returned so slowly, trickling into his mind. His whole body ached and he felt like he had been run over by a Behemoth. But he had to get out of here, wherever he was. 

It felt like hours walking through a never changing scenery, the silence  oppressive  while Noctis was left alone with the last of his memories and his heart beat faster as he remembered. He had slept with Ardyn and hadn't regretted it one bit. And a bitter realisation has dawned upon him as to why he couldn't hate the man anymore. Ten years surely had changed his mind, but being left alone floating through the realm of the  Crystal had given him much time to think  over everything. What had haunted him had been Ardyn's expressions. The sadness, the bitterness in his eyes. 

And his smile in the end that had ripped Noctis heart apart and the last thing he had given Ardyn as a memory was a kiss. Noctis stood and stared down, shaking his head. 

Then the last bit of his memories came rushing back, how he had sacrificed himself to follow Ardyn into the Beyond. How they had been in the Astral Realm and Ardyn had stood before him a few  metres  away, but it hadn't been him. The daemons had used Ardyn's form, wanting to destroy Noctis , but the Chosen One had been faster and Luna had been there and his dad and his friends.

Noctis heart dropped as fear coursed through his veins. Had he utterly destroyed Ardyn's soul in the end and not given him the peace the man had longed for so long? And his friends… he dearly hoped they were alive  so they could rebuild Insomnia. Without a King. The world  didn't  need  one anymore now.

Barking brought him back to reality and out of his thoughts and he turned several times as he couldn't see what was approaching but heard the padding of paws nonetheless. And like two beacons of light , Umbra and Pryna walked up to him, the black dog barking again. Of course Umbra was here too,  he wasn't  needed anymore in the world as a messenger.

Noctis  knelt  and scratched both dogs behind their ears, smiling at them. “Why are you both here?” Pryna barked and Noctis wasn't  any  the wiser now, but the white dog turned and  simply walked into a seemingly random direction. “You two wanna guide me out of here?” A bark again. Noctis took that as a yes. Umbra  was kind enough to wait until Noctis stood and started to follow Pryna. At some  point  Pryna started to run and Noctis had no choice but to jog after the dog, Umbra always at his side.

The scenery change  slowly , small differences at first, but soon the darkness lifted and  grass crunched beneath his boots. A field. Full of Sylleblossoms . Their scent hit him hard and he staggered for a moment , too stunned  by all the sensations that were rushing at him at once. The sun, a soft breeze and the scent of the flowers were too much and he closed his eyes. His mind was dizzy and he felt way too lightheaded.

Until…

“Noctis.”

A sob broke free . His father's voice. Opening his eyes he was greeted by a number of people. His dad. Luna, Ravus and their mother. And…his own. Aulea stood next to Regis , her clear sky blue eyes on him, shining suspiciously, looking like she could start to cry any moment. Noctis stumbled to her, into her arms and she pulled him close. He had seen her just  in  photos and had heard  of her from the stories his father had told only reluctantly. 

Her arms wrapped around  him and she hummed soothingly. Noctis never was one to have such a breakdown, but he saw her for the first time and maybe she had watched over him? Watched him go to his death? Pressing his face into her neck he tried to control his breathing. “Mother...Mom...I ... ”

“You are so brave, my son. And you grew into a handsome man.” She leaned back and gazed at his face, cupping his cheek with one hand . Noctis noticed that he had the exact same eyes and hair color  as his mother. Aulea’s smile widened. 

Noctis chuckled weakly and as a hand landed on his shoulder, squeezing it soft, he looked into his father's eyes. His father, who had rammed the sword through him, but he had to do it. That had been the prophecy all along, but Noctis wondered if there hadn't been another way to safe Ardyn. 

“I walked tall, Dad.” Noctis just said and Regis nodded. 

“I know.”

Then he was hugged again  by his mother and father and they truly could be a family now. Aulea sniffed and Noctis laughed again. It felt so surreal. Like a dream. Then his attention was  captured by Luna, who walked up at him. He was older now than her and she still looked like twenty 

“Noctis. I knew you would banish the darkness… and…I am glad, that you have found his heart.” 

Confusion hit Noctis and he furrowed his brow. What did she mean by that? Had she known all along that he and Ardyn would…? She smiled and cupped his face.

“Underneath all that darkness lays a yearning heart.”

Noctis swallowed and took a deep breath. “Where is he? Is he here…?” His voice only trembled  slightly , but he wanted to know. He needed to know.

Luna nodded, but her posture tensed  somewhat . After all the man did stab her in the stomach. “He waits.”

_ “I’ll wait for you in the Beyond, Noctis.” _

The words echoed in his head. It had been a promise and wish to see him again. Noctis lowered his gaze to the ground.

“Noctis.” His head whipped up again as Ravus spoke to him, no bitterness or hatred in his voice. “I am sorry that I doubted you and your strength and will. Luna was right in believing in you…”

He was baffled and stared at the white haired man, blinking. Did he really apologize? Noctis looked Ravus in the  eye  and the man lowered his head the slightest, casting his gaze down and he placed his right hand above his heart. “My King.”

Noctis could  only nod, still too shocked that  _ Ravus _ of all people would apologize him, but he knew that in the end the man had  had faith in him. The letters scattered on the ground had been proof enough. 

“We should continue to the Citadel.” Luna  spoke softly , breaking the heavy silence, taking  Noctis’  hand in hers and  squeezing it in a comforting manner. To soothe Noctis. And he saw the glint in her blue eyes and Noctis brow twitched as did one corner of his mouth.

So the man was near and when Noctis closed his eyes he thought he could feel Ardyn's presence - a radiant light shining brighter than any other that was close, even brighter than his own light and he gasped. 

Ardyn had been the first King of Light, after all. The first Chosen by the Crystal. He had felt that during their last encounter.

The others fell back a bit as Luna marched forth dragging Noctis over the fields and the scenery slowly changed. There were houses - old ones, perhaps from a time hundreds of years ago and other buildings far more modern. The city - if Noctis could call the  myriad of buildings from  so many  ages of the same city  in the same place like that - was pure chaos. And what caught his attention were some strange lights, generators and other things he  didn’t know what they were. But something in the back of his mind  clicked : Solheim. 

The lost civilization. 

The Citadel was pretty much the same as he remembered, only that it wasn't destroyed in some parts and his heart ached for a moment.

“The afterlife is a strange place, Noctis. The queens and kings are influencing the scene you are seeing here. Quite obvious with the different houses but every soul finds their place in here. We all tried to rebuild our homes here.”

“Huh, so my ancestors are here?” Of course they  were . Where should they be then if not here? 

“And every soul that died in the past, but they are hiding right now.  Otherwise, it would be much livelier here.”

Swiftly they walked up the stairs and through numerous corridors and halls. The Throne Room came closer and closer with each step and Noctis was...nervous. He didn't need to be, but still his skin prickled. Their footsteps seemed to echo louder from the walls the closer they got. Luna squeezed his hand reassuringly and she quickly looked at him. The doors were open and Noctis came to a sudden halt.

He could hear it - the typical sound of the Armiger floating like a protective barrier around  its user. Luna let go of his hand and motioned with her head to the throne. Noctis walked slowly through the open doors, gaze never straying from the throne and his heart skipped a beat - or two.

There he was. Sleeping on the throne, surrounded by his Armiger. 

Ardyn looked peaceful like  this  and Noctis noted that his hair was a bit longer and that the tiredness on his face has disappeared, the burden of being the vessel  of the Scourge to be eliminated. Ever so slowly he walked up the stairs, his footsteps loud in the big chamber, but it seemed not to wake the man upon the throne.

_ ‘The place where he belongs to. From the very beginning…’ _

Before he truly realised it , he stood before Ardyn, eyeing the Armiger which didn't stop swirling around him, magenta particles floating in the air and softly clinking against the moving weapons. Noctis didn't know what he should do now. Call out  to Ardyn ? Get past the Armiger and touch him? Or should he simply wait and gaze so long at Ardyn, that he would feel it and crack one eye open?

The young King was unsure, but then he shook his head and simply listened to his heart and stepping up to him and  close enough that he could nearly touch the weapons . They dissolved leaving only the floating crystalline particles in the air. Noctis  bent  down and gently placed his hand on Ardyn's cheek.

“I am here ,” he whispered, not sure if those were the right words. With Ardyn  one could never know. 

The man's closed eyes snapped open and Noctis breath was taken away. He had hoped that amber eyes would gaze back at him, the colour and the intensity which had haunted him days after their meetings. But instead blue  orbs looked back at him, almost the same hue as his own and Noct didn't know how to handle this sudden change. The amber tone, sometimes looking like molten gold, had mesmerized him. He had been used to  the colour, but maybe that had been a side effect from the daemons.

“You  _ did  _ take you time, Noctis.  Did you perhaps take a small nap in between waking up and waltzing in here?” Ardyn said and the corner of his mouth lifted up into his trademark smirk. The sarcasm, on the other hand, seemed to be purely Ardyn and Noct wouldn't want it any other  way he realized as he smiled back at Ardyn, thumb stroking  over Ardyn's cheek now .

“Dying is exhausting, you know! And who  was sleeping on the throne like nothing in the world could wake him?” Noctis retorted and Ardyn just laughed low. 

More footsteps could be heard and Noctis knew that it was his family and Luna’s, but  who  he hadn't  expected was…

“Oh, finally awake,  _ dear _ brother?”  a  voice exclaimed, dripping with mockery and hate. Actual hate. 

Ardyn's smirk  faded away , his mouth  now drawn into a thin line and he closed his eyes with a deep and weary sigh. Noctis knew even before Ardyn spoke his name, who this person was.

“Izunia. Finally coming  down from your high horse and granting me a visit. Surely you must have seen what you little stunt brought about , ” Ardyn said, voice even,  though anger  bubbled underneath and it wouldn't take much before Ardyn would punch his brother.

“My little stunt?! Who  was it again…” Izunia fell flat on his ass, holding his bleeding nose and  stared  up at Noctis. Nobody had seen  _ that _ coming. The young king was  fed  up and had warped to Izunia in a flurry of blue particles and had punched the man in the face. 

He deserved it after all. Noctis gaze was unforgiving and  hatred  burned in the blue orbs. Even Ardyn was surprised,  for he had never thought that Noctis of all people would  _ defend _ him.

“One more word and you  lose  your teeth , ” Noctis just growled, blinking then in surprise  at his own protectiveness and anger. Did his feelings for Ardyn run deeper  than he had thought? Had that one night revealed his true emotions?

It was strange looking at Izunia. It was like looking in a mirror, just with minor differences.  Izunia’s  eyes had a different shape,  making him look like a sneaky bastard and his mouth was smaller and thinner, the colour of his hair was pitch black, not the black  of Noct’s own strands.  Which  sometimes shone blueish in the right light.

Noctis stepped back and looked around. Aulea was outright smiling, not even hiding it behind a hand or something. Regis lips twitched and Luna openly chuckled. Then he noticed the other past kings and queens, some of them looking blankly at the scene unfolding before them. Other snickered behind their hands and others still talked in quiet voices.

“Well, Noct, that is my dear brother Izunia.” Ardyn casually introduced his brother, while he sauntered down the stairs to stand beside Noctis. Too close to be casual, but Noctis took a shuddering  breath  and leaned against the older man.

Ardyn's lips quirked up, as he glanced at Noctis, finally free from the daemons and their influence on his broken mind. Breathing was easier, simply existing in the Afterlife was easier than living in the World of Ruin .  He felt a pang of guilt in his chest ,  but he had only ever done everything he was capable of to make Noctis loathe him.

Oh, and how _well_ that had worked. Ardyn then turned to Luna and this would possibly be the one and only time that the man went down on one knee, pressing his fist against his heart and lowering his head. “I apologize, dear Lunafreya. What I have done to you is…unforgivable, shortening your life, but…” He lifted his head again, gaze locking with Luna’s. “I saw it as a necessity and you as a piece that had to be removed from the chessboard. And I thought it far quicker than the slow cruel death the Astrals had in mind for you.” The last was a terrible excuse to justify what he had done, one he shouldn't resort to. 

He had been a healer once and  ending a life was like  destroying his duty, but  that  had been buried as his own  people had tortured him. Ardyn unbeknownst to himself, now shook and only when Luna  knelt  before him and placed a cool hand against his cheek  did he realised it.

“The  darkness had  engulfed you, had warped your mind and the only thing that was left was your revenge and hate… I  have  seen your light. Underneath it all…”

Ardyn lowered his gaze again and the Throne Room was dead silent, even his brother had shut his mouth. “You  _ truly _ are an Oracle, Lunafreya. Kind…and forgiving. Pure. I don't deserve this…”

“You  don't, ” Izunia commented and Noct glared at the man and the urge to kick him just grew more and more. His knuckles still tingled a bit from the impact of the punch.

“That's  _ enough _ , Izunia.”

Noct's ancestors stepped  aside to let the  newest  visitor through and Noctis froze as  he slowly realized who  was walking up to them. Auburn hair fell in curly waves over her shoulders  and back, and she was a bit taller  than  Noctis and smiled at him for a short moment, the quirk of her lips all too familiar to him. Ardyn stood and his eyes were wide  and glistened with unshed tears. 

“Mother…”  he  rasped. Noctis eyed mother and son, smiling at the reunion. Now he knew where Ardyn's looks came from. She was a beautiful woman, graceful in every movement. The very same eye colour and the shape of Ardyn's mouth  that he clearly had inherited  from his  mother . 

Then  Ardyn’s mother dragged the man into a tight hug, placing her head on his shoulder, one hand digging into the auburn hair. “My beautiful, caring Ardyn. You are here, finally ,” she  whispered and Noctis felt uncomfortable watching the scene, feeling like an intruder on something so intimate. Ardyn started to sob, the tears now falling freely as he returned the hug, feeling the love of a mother after two thousand years again.

Noctis looked away, at his parents, who talked quietly, small smiles on their lips. Luna  had  disappeared further back to stand beside… Nyx? She was comfortable with him, leaning slightly into him and the man smiled as he saw that Noctis was looking at them.

They all had time to talk. They had eternity now. Another form of immortality and one  that  Ardyn hopefully could enjoy this time. Although his brother seemed to be the root of the problems and the one who had betrayed his own blood over something so silly like a title and the throne.

Noctis looked back at Ardyn, who slowly stepped away from his mother, blue eyes shining with love and Noctis wondered if  this  was Ardyn’s true nature ; still a sarcastic asshole, but kind and caring much like Luna. 

Or maybe even more  so . 

The man spoke in a hushed tone with his mother. No one  could  hear what they talked about and his mother placed her hand against his cheek, smiling. 

“You are home, Ardyn ,” she said louder.

Then the man turned to the last King of Light, stepping up to him and sweeping him up in hug, lifting Noctis off the ground. The action so sudden that an undignified yelp escaped Noctis’ throat , very unmanly so, but he wrapped his arms around Ardyn's neck. Ardyn  spun them  around, but finally set Noctis back on solid ground,  a bright smile on the man's lips.

“Thank you, Noct. For freeing me of the Scourge. For bringing  the light back to the world so that Eos  can heal , ” Ardyn whispered. “For reminding me of who I was.”

_ For being with me in the end… _

Noctis lowered his gaze, feet shifting. He didn't know what to do or say. He always was at  a  loss what to do around Ardyn. Hate him? Like him? Love him? Maybe  scream or yell at him?  But Ardyn  decided for him and cupped  Noctis’  face between his hands. It was dead silent around them and it was a miracle that Izunia didn't jump to his feet, accusing  his brother of being a monster and  doing forbidden things with men, which in  Noctis’  time were perfectly fine and accepted in most parts of the society. Ardyn  bent  down and placed the gentlest kiss on Noctis’ lips ; chaste and nothing like the ones he had given  Noctis when they had been still alive. 

Well, maybe they were more alive than ever now. Weird as it might be, but Ardyn felt  that way . At ease, light without the Scourge and darkness driving him mad and pushing him down. He had fought constantly over his mind, his sanity, the last shred of the human he once had been.

And now could be again.

Noctis reopened his eyes, still a bit confused about Ardyn's blue ones, but a small smile danced on his lips and he sighed.

“I think it would be best if we leave the two of them alone for  a while ,” Ardyn's mother said and looked at the others. Most of the past kings and queens took their leave, but not before throwing a few more glances at the unusual pair. “ And my name is Calia, Noctis.” 

With that she ushered the rest of the people out of the room, even dragging Izunia outside by his ear . Noctis raised a brow and felt strange. He really couldn't put a finger on why, but seeing the  Ardyn’s mother and everyone else was… overwhelming.

The whole situation.

Noctis breathed deeply in and looked back at Ardyn, whose gaze was so warm. It was unusual to see Ardyn like that ; he had just known the man as vengeful, bitter and so full of darkness. Now though… Ardyn was warmth and light and kindness, a healer once more. The kind man the world had turned  its back on.

“Is that your real  self ?” Noctis asked.

“Of course. Why shouldn't it  be ? Are you so surprised, Noct?” Ardyn asked and tilted his head, raising a brow. “You already saw it. My last moments…”

Noctis very well remembered and sighed, one corner of his mouth lifting up. “That you had to suffer for so long…”

Ardyn placed his hand on Noctis shoulder, squeezing it gently. “Well, you did end it. And… I think we need to speak about a lot of things, Noctis. But not here where someone could eavesdrop on us. Your room or mine?”

Noctis furrowed his brow and opened his mouth wanting to ask ‘How?’, but he had seen the city and it  didn’t really surprise  him that his rooms would exist here too.

“I think mine?”  he  asked nonetheless and the older male nodded, blue eyes shining with something Noctis didn't recognize. Mirth? Was Ardyn in a playful mood? “Mine would be best.”

It really felt strange, being dead and not feeling so. The Beyond - it truly existed and he could finally get to know his mother - and Ardyn. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks at [Eowyn (eowynsmusings)](http://archiveofourown.org/users/eowynsmusings) for beta'ing. You are amazing ♥
> 
> So, this is Ardyn's telling about his past. I took some liberties with it. Hope you will enjoy it.

Noctis flopped down on his bed, sighing at how soft the mattress was and wondered if they still needed to sleep and eat for real or if they just did it to pass some time. Ardyn leaned against one of the floor to ceiling windows, arms crossed over his chest and he looked out over the patchwork like Insomnia. A small smile graced his lips and he looked entirely at peace.

“I almost forgot what it is like to be… normal, not having constant growling and screeching in your head. Just our own trail of thoughts and silence , ” Ardyn mused and Noctis turned his head to look at him, not saying anything yet. “It is refreshing after two thousand years.”

“You feel free?” Noctis asked and rolled onto his side, facing Ardyn and simply watching the man. Ardyn nodded and then his shoulders slumped the slightest bit and he looked torn now. Noctis furrowed his brow and sat up. “What’s on your mind, Ardyn? You wanted to talk , ” Noctis pointed out and stood to walk over to Ardyn, leaning his head against the shoulder of the older male.

“Do I deserve this?” Ardyn said, not looking at Noctis, gaze still flitting over the numerous different buildings. “This peace?”

“Everyone deserves another chance,” Noctis said after a moment of gathering his thoughts. Ardyn just snorted as if he couldn't believe it. “I mean it. I couldn't hate you back then and I thought I would never forgive what you have done to me,  _ our _ hometown and Luna… She… she is too pure and doesn’t hate you.”

“And now because your  _ precious _ little Luna forgave me,  _ you _ can do it too?” Ardyn asked, bitterness seeping through. The man shook his head. “I apologize, Noct. All of this is...still so new. And old habits die hard.”

Noctis understood Ardyn. The man had reached his goal, his last wish and now what was left for him? Nothing but the guilt over all the things he had done in the past. Good or bad. And it seemed as if he couldn't let go of that hate that he had nurtured in his life.

“And it's not because of Luna. In the Crystal… I had a lot of time thinking through what you have told me. How much of your soul you had laid bare in that moment.” Noctis now turned and pressed himself flush against Ardyn and the older man wrapped one arm around him, humming low in thought. “I couldn't forget your expression and then...Bahamut told me what I should do. His  _ revelation _ . This irked me. My skin crawled , but… I had to fulfill the prophecy. I had to free your soul. Give you peace.”

Ardyn looked down at Noctis, a small smile on his lips. His fingers stroked over the small of Noctis’ back in soothing motions.

“There was no choice left for you, but to kill me. The price was high. I wonder what would have happened had I killed you with the Crystal’s power inside you. Would the world be drowned further in darkness? Or would the power of the Crystal still cleanse the world? But… I would have lived on, perhaps until time itself would have ended…” The man spoke, his fingers drawing circles on Noctis’ back.

“I…hated piercing your heart, seeing your true self in that last moment. I had wanted to see such a genuine smile on your face more often , ” Noctis admitted after a while of comfortable silence stretching between them. They had nowhere to be and a lot of time on their hands. No one would rush them to do anything. 

“Now you can , ” Ardyn whispered low, his voice rumbling through his chest. Noctis closed his eyes and just sighed as Ardyn’s hand now stroked over his back firmly. “You have your family back, Noctis…”

“Not all. My friends are still alive. I left them behind…” Noctis murmured. “I…”

Ardyn gently lifted Noctis’ chin, looking Noctis deeply in the eyes. Tears threatened to spill and Ardyn stroked over Noctis bearded chin with his thumb . 

“They can rebuild Insomnia. The whole of Eos and _one day_ they will join us here, Noctis. One day. It wasn’t their time to leave the world yet.” Ardyn whispered and Noctis took deep breaths. Ardyn’s hand settled heavily on his lower back now. “Nor was it yours. Ten years already stolen from you by the Crystal and you barely had lived your life. The prophecy cut your life short. And I… it all boils down to me. If I had known how to use the Crystal’s power properly and in the right way, none of this would have happened had I paid attention, especially to Izunia.”

Noctis gaze shifted from sadness to anger, a fierce fire burning in them now. He wanted to yell that _yes_ , it was his fault and at the same time disagree with the man. He was torn between his feelings for the man and what had happened. 

“Stop,” Noctis said fiercely and took Ardyn’s wrist and pulled the hand away from his chin. “You couldn’t have known. And the Astrals didn’t give you clear instructions or a manual to read about the Crystal, right?” Ardyn snorted unamused, but shook his head.

A surprised gasp escaped the taller man as Noctis all but launched himself at him. Ardyn wrapped both his arms around Noctis and the young king kissed the life out of him. Or should he say the death out of him? Noctis wanted to feel Ardyn on his skin again. The sudden need to kiss him had surprised Noctis himself, but now it just felt right.

He pushed his tongue into Ardyn’s mouth, moaning into the kiss, as Ardyn’s hand carded through his hair and tugged at the raven mane lightly.

His hands clawed at Ardyn’s clothes and he leaned back to take some breaths. The other man watched him out of darkened blue eyes, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

“Full of surprises, Noct,” he murmured and leaned down to press a gentle kiss on Noctis’ lips, cradling his face in his hands. “You show me new sides of yourself. I am flattered and honoured.”

Then Ardyn pushed him slowly and gently back to his bed and when Noctis hit it with the back of his legs he let himself flop down again. Noctis crawled into the middle of it, discarding his shoes and jacket. Ardyn took off his shoes and coat as well, placing the latter at the end of Noctis’ bed. Slowly crawling to Noctis and over him, cradling the face of the beautiful young man beneath him and kissing him in the gentlest way. Unhurried. Loving.

Noctis softly moaned into the kiss, wrapping his arms around the man’s neck, tilting his head this and that way. He didn’t know how long this kiss lasted, but when Ardyn pulled away he took deep breaths. His eyes flitted over Ardyn’s features and he smiled. The man really looked less tired and simply happy, blue eyes shining bright.

Ardyn leaned down again, pressing pecks on Noctis’ lips, the corner of his mouth, the tip of his nose and Noctis chuckled, closing his eyes for a brief moment. He basked in the loving attention of Ardyn, trying to get used to the real self of the older man.

This was him ; not the twisted man he had first met at Galdin Quay. He had seen bits and pieces of Ardyn’s life in the Crystal, very vague and sometimes even blurred so much that they didn’t made sense.

“I…” Noctis started but was interrupted by Ardyn with more kisses and every time he tried to say something Ardyn silenced him this way. “Can I...mmm...Ardyn!”

Ardyn pulled away again, laughing at him , but not in the mocking fashion he knew - no, it was a fond and light laugh. “Yes, your  Majesty ? What would you like to say?”

“I...forgot,” Noctis grumbled after he had stared at Ardyn like a gaping fish, trying to gather his thoughts again. Ardyn just laughed some more and smiled down at Noctis fondly. “Maybe I will remember it later…”

“Maybe, but for now…” Ardyn murmured and claimed  Noct's kiss swollen lips again in tender kisses that grew in passion with time. One of the former healer’s hands trailed over  Noctis’  chest and neck. Noctis sighed and pressed his chest up into Ardyn’s exploring hand. “Eager again? Or missing my touch?” 

His breath ghosted over Noctis’ lips and he gently brushed them. Then he started to pepper Noct’s pale neck with kisses, sucking on the skin. Noctis softly moaned and buried one hand in Ardyn’s wild hair. 

“Perhaps both,” Noctis answered after a while and chuckled as Ardyn did the same against his neck. Another sigh left his lips and he carded his hand through Ardyn’s silken locks and the man practically purred. “My pet.”

Ardyn immediately looked at Noctis, nearly sitting up and regarding Noctis with a smug grin and a raised brow. Noctis missed the weight and warmth on top of him and placed his hands on Ardyn’s thighs. “Pet? Am I some cat to you? Should I purr nonstop and demand to be petted and stroked whenever I want. Sitting down in your lap, no matter who is around? I very much fancy this idea now. Maybe some cat ears to complete my absolutely gorgeous looks.” 

Noctis cheeks blushed red, thought that was harder to see now thanks to his beard, but Ardyn’s fingers stroked over one cheek. “Forget it, okay?” Noctis pleaded in a low voice.

“Oh, I shall not, my dear,” he purred and started to tickle Noct, lowering himself on the man again, but he underestimated Noctis in this state and in a few heartbeats he was on his back, not really knowing how. Noctis held both his hands down and pressed them into the mattress. 

“If you ever do that again I swear I’ll kick you out of my room.” Noctis growled and Ardyn only grinned. 

“Ah, if I only had known back then in the Throne Room and later…” Ardyn lamented in a quite theatrically voice, sighing loudly. “Or even earlier. Little Noctis is ticklish! How fast you would have fallen.”

Now the man was definitely teasing him, slipping into familiar territory, although the bitter edge was missing now - for the better.

Noctis pouted like a small child and Ardyn dragged him down to press a sweet kiss onto his lips as an apology. “I am just teasing, Noct. That is _me_. The sarcasm and the teasing. The kindness…” he murmured and took a deep breath. He closes his eyes and touched his forehead to Noctis’, adding, “and love. So much I was too blind to realize…”

Noctis sat up straight again, gasping as he remembered what he wanted to ask and the older male looked up at him with a startled expression which soon turned into an intrigued one.

“I remember now!” Noctis exclaimed and looked at Ardyn with wide eyes. “I want to know everything!”

“Please be a bit more specific or I have no idea what you would want to talk about with me. I have vast knowledge of how our world works and how to manipulate people.”

“I want to know more about  **your** life, Ardyn. Every detail about it…” Noctis said and smiled at Ardyn. “Your past...I…” 

Silence stretched between them as nervousness bubbled through Noctis’ body and Ardyn didn’t answer right away, tilting his head.

“That will be a long story. You should make yourself comfortable,” Ardyn suggested and opened his arms, smirking. 

Noctis chuckled low and did just that, placing his head onto Ardyn’s chest, listening to the steady thud of his heart, half laying on top of him. Ardyn wrapped his arms around Noctis and took a deep breath, sighing then to gather his thoughts.

“Where should I start?” he asked, but didn’t wait for an answer from Noctis as he didn't expected one. “You have met my mother and brother already. So perhaps with the small family who bears the name Lucis Caelum and would be the very first and new royal family of Lucis after Solheim fell. When all that happened I was already twenty years old, my brother only fifteen and he didn’t understand the world anymore. I had gathered the blessings of the five Astrals to fight their brother and stop the Starscourge…”

Noctis hummed and stroked his fingers over Ardyn’s chest. The older male smiled and rubbed over Noctis’ upper arm with one hand.

“We first thought I succeeded, so they took their leave, but their messengers remained on Eos. As soon as the first people grew sick again the Astrals decided to choose me, well, the Crystal did and Bahamut and the others blessed me with the powers of an Oracle and of a King. Only Shiva and Ramuh told me how to utilize the powers of the Crystal, but that was not nearly enough to truly understand that damnable stone.”

Ardyn grew silent for a while and Noctis craned his neck to look up at him, waiting patiently. 

“I traveled the continent with my dear black Chocobo Nox and Gilgamesh - the very first Shield in mankind's history. They both kept me on track and helped me through the worst days in my life, when I healed too many people in one day. Always when we visited another of the small settlements and villages , I simply couldn’t say no and they needed my help dearly. Gilgamesh commented that I looked like the walking dead, too pale and wobbly on my legs.”

“Did you know that you contained the Scourge when you healed a person?” Noctis asked and Ardyn chuckled, his chest vibrating and Noctis closed his eyes wanting to press himself closer to Ardyn.

“Yes, I knew. How could I not? I dragged the wretched sickness out of their bodies and when we visited Insomnia again we went to Crystal to purge it from my body. A couple of times, that was successful as well...…” The smile faded from Ardyn’s voice and face. Noctis tensed involuntarily, looking at Ardyn again and the next smile was infinitely sad. “My mother grew sick. As a queen she saw it as her duty to walk among the common folk. We had once belonged to them too. Perhaps she caught the Scourge on one of her walks, talking with the people… I didn't exactly know, but one of the maids came running to me when I had come back from a two weeks journey to Galdin. I could take the Scourge into my body before she truly turned into a daemon, but she was already too weak to survive on her own without the Scourge. She died with a smile in her face, clasping my hand.” Ardyn sighed, gently stroking Noctis’ arm. 

Noctis pressed his face into Ardyn’s chest, kissing him there. He understood the pain of losing one of his parents.

“Father...father went mad after her death, unable to rule Insomnia and Lucis. He never was the same and died a few years later. He had disappeared from the public completely and the crown fell into my hands. The right to rule, but… I had duties to fulfill, the people on Eos needed me and I gave the crown to my younger brother Izunia, who had learned more about ruling than me, thought I never really abdicated and was still seen as the king… The Healer King of Light. I had traveled the world too much and had seen what the Scourge did to people. How it twisted them into mindless monsters…”

Noctis sighed and then leaned up to kiss Ardyn’s cheek, pressing his forehead gently against the man’s temple. Ardyn turned his head and they shared a sweet loving kiss. Ardyn breathed out loudly.

“Sometimes they weren’t that mindless. They could speak and it was always sad, always in search of their loved ones or mourning. Or they were angry. Killing them was the only option and their salvation. Gilgamesh was always by my side and after months of traveling...or perhaps it was a year already or more? The first signs showed that something was wrong with  _ me _ .”

Noctis pressed his face into the crook of Ardyn’s neck, lightly kissing and nipping the skin there and Ardyn chuckled. 

“Do not distract me, Noct,” he murmured. “I mean it,  _ boy _ . You wanted me to tell you my story, so please keep yourself in check and listen. I won’t repeat it another time.”

Noctis stopped and nodded. “Sorry,” he apologized and Ardyn squeezed his arm as a reassurance.

“The first sign was that, whenever I healed a person I heard screeching and terrible growling and as nobody seemed to be fazed or terrified I knew that  _ this _ was in my head. The next didn’t wait long to show itself… I had mood swings out of nowhere and sometimes when Gil asked one question too much I lashed out at him without proper reason. I always apologized immediately, but Gil shrugged and one evening voiced his worries. I kept brushing it off , saying that all this healing and the situation most people lived in kept me on edge… but one day… one day changed everything…” Ardyn said and he closed his eyes, taking a deep breath as if to brace himself for the memories that would flood his mind. “We went back to a Haven, because the settlement did not have an inn where we could have slept and we declined the offers to stay in the homes of the people. As I set foot on the Haven , pain erupted in my leg and shot through my whole body. The whole Haven glowed stronger as if to dispel an attack of a daemon or one that tried to set foot on it. Gil had to lift me off the ground, and eventually I stopped screaming in pain. He sat on the ground next to Haven, cradling me close and he gasped in shock as I turned my head to look at him.” 

Noctis almost knew what Gilgamesh had seen then, not Ardyn, the loving healer but the demonic face of the consequences of containing the Scourge in his body. Too pale a face, dark black splotches at the corner of his mouth and black streaks as if the man had cried.

“He didn’t push me away, like I expected it, but instead he touched my cheek. I was far too cold to be alive he said and he had been worried sick. I tried to explain to him what that meant, but the truth was… I was so scared, Noctis. I didn’t know what was happening, why the Haven reacted this way to my presence, but in the end I somehow knew that we had been absent for far too long. I should have purged my body sooner and should have continued afterwards.”

“You couldn’t have known. You just wanted to help your people,” Noctis pointed out in a soft voice. He never would have thought that one day he would be lying on his bed with Ardyn and that the man would be telling him about his past. Freely.

“I decided that it was time to go back to Insomnia after…five years I learned on the journey back and much had changed in Insomnia. The people still awaited my return and Izunia had replaced the makeshift Council of my father, which truly had the best in mind for our people, with backstabbing and lying bastards and snakes. I recognized no one when I came back, as Izunia greeted me. Word somehow had traveled fast of my return. My brother… he had changed. So much coldness in his eyes, but he played the loving younger brother nonetheless. He was jealous, having heard of my journey and how the people called me King of Light, Saviour of Mankind and some even dared to call me part Messenger and Astral.”

Noctis now wrapped his arms tighter around Ardyn, but then he leaned back and sat next to him. “We should switch places, Ardyn.” 

Ardyn watched Noctis with an unreadable gaze and then pressed a kiss to the Chosen One's lips before he laid his head on Noctis chest, inhaling his scent. Noctis could truly wrap his arms around the older man, holding him close, because Noctis knew that he would need that reassurance, that safety now. Noctis couldn’t hate Ardyn, even though he had stabbed Luna… but the woman had clearly forgiven him.

“He had changed the resting place of the Crystal into a more open place.  _ So, that people could pray more easily and without stepping into the palace.  _ As he had said. I believed him, but that was just an excuse. I was to touch the Crystal before the very eyes of my people. I hoped - and so did Gil - that the Crystal would cleanse me once more of the Scourge, but the exact opposite happened. The unspeakable…” 

Noctis held his breath and buried his face into Ardyn’s hair. The voice of the other sounded so distant, detached as if he had only watched it happen. 

“The Crystal rejected me. Quite violently.”

“You don’t need to…”

“No, Noctis. Let me finish this story,” Ardyn said and his hand gripped the fabric of Noctis’ shirt tighter. “The pain was far worse than the one at the Haven. I thought I would burn from the inside out and my head exploded. Of course I screamed. No one could hold back under such onslaught. I dropped to my knees cradling my burned hand to my chest. Truly burned. I will never forget the smell...nor the face of my brother when I looked at him. Gil was immediately at my side, trying to comfort me, but I only looked at my brother whose expression turned from shocked to disgusted to...satisfied, a cruel smile forming on his lips.” Ardyn’s voice wavered the slightest and Noctis held him just tighter, squeezing his eyes shut.

“ _ Is  _ **_that_ ** _ your King of Light? Your  _ **_saviour_ ** _?! Look at him, truly look and see his rotten soul. Maybe he was the one who released the Starscourge to lift himself above the Astrals, to claim the praise of the people and in the end to led mankind to their doom! _ He...he tried to yank me away from Gil, but the loyal friend he was , he drew his blade. I couldn’t speak or I would have told him to run… To escape. But it was too late. The guards circled us, drawing closer and Izunia stepped back. I hid my face in Gil’s chest. People shouldn’t see me like that…”

Noctis’ heart thumped harder against his ribcage and Ardyn had to feel it, because the man placed his hand over Noctis’ heart. He was silent for a long time and Noctis let him, just holding him and hoping the man would understand that Noctis felt sympathy with him and that his heart hurt and bleed for Ardyn.

“I don’t know anymore how they managed to separate me from Gilgamesh, but the crowd gasped and the howled, cried and threw insults at me. The very people I healed turned their back on me...my own people… ‘ _ To show that he isn’t human anymore, he should feel the bite of the whip. 50 and if he still stands 50 more.’  _  What happened then was a blur, I only remember that I screamed and blacked out only to wake up to burning pain, the whip hitting my back without mercy. The wounds of course healed because the Scourge didn’t want to lose its host.”

“I should have broken his nose and jaw…” Noctis growled and Ardyn smiled for the briefest moment, kissing Noctis’ jaw. “I would kill him if that is possible.”

“We are in fact dead, my dear…” Ardyn said and settled back into his comfortable position, listening to Noctis’ heartbeat. “I don’t know if you felt the scars. The blessing of the Astrals were scarred too… Izunia threw me into the dungeon after they were done. He...came to me one day, when I was still in pain. The Scourge needed longer to stitch me back up, weakened through the Crystal’s light. Perhaps a part got purged from me, but not enough and it seemed that Izunia wasn’t finished with me. I was chained to restrict my movements. Then he told me Gilgamesh disappeared, bolted from Insomnia, disgusted too by my appearance and what I was. I knew he lied, but in that moment I was broken. Then I had a few days peace and quiet, only the guards bringing me food... my company for a few seconds.”

“One day, I don’t know how long I was in the dungeons, I got dragged back outside for another punishment. The crowd...cheered, cheered for what was to come. Burning irons were used and I blocked out the pain, trying my hardest not to scream again, not to give the people the satisfaction of hearing the pain in my voice. I...bit my lip until it bled. And that would be my treatment for the next weeks. I grew numb to it, until I would almost stand proudly before them. _They won’t break me_ , I thought. _They will never see it…_ One evening a guard lingered, I knew him already, because he always had stayed longer than he needed to and I beckoned him closer. I wanted to grab his dagger and kill myself before I would shatter. The daemons’ voices growing louder, demanding that I shed blood. It was actually just a feeling, they never truly uttered words except hunger and blood. The guard said he still believed in me, not buying my brother's lies….the accusations. As it turned out I had healed his little sister once.”

Noctis hand slowly stroked Ardyn’s back, tears pricked at his eyes and he finally truly understood Ardyn’s pain and the hate for the Caelum line. He choose a low soothing hum to calm Ardyn, anchor him to the afterlife. The man sounded lost in his memories and Noctis regretted that he had asked in the first place.

“I got hold of the dagger and slit my throat. Not the best idea because it was a slow agonizing death. The guard was in shock, but he didn’t go away and called others. He stayed and I think… he took my hand as I laid there on the ground, bleeding to death, choking on my blood. But it was only temporary and Bahamut barred the Afterlife to me. I couldn't pass on. Too impure.” Ardyn let out a deep sigh and leaned up, looking down at Noctis. “After my little stunt they killed  _ me _ in front of the crowd, Izunia twisting  _ my  _ sword within my chest. The Sword of the Wise.”

Noctis pulled Ardyn down again, carding his fingers through his locks, unable to say anything. Ardyn wasn’t far from finished anyway and he desperately needed to tell at least one person

“Then Bahamut appeared before the new King of Lucis, bestowing him with my ring and the King’s powers. The power of the Oracles would be in the hand of the noble family line Nox Fleuret. Izunia...tried to erase me from history, purge my existence from this world and I was banished in a magical sealed prison on Angelgard. Ramuh’s place. I...spent years, decades inside of this prison and in the beginning people from Galdin visited me to leave food there but at some point they were from Izunia’s entourage…”

“Those years were the darkest in my life. The people under Izunia’s command were...cruel. I blocked out what they did to me. I was their...plaything.”

Ardyn didn’t comment further on it and Noctis was partially glad he didn’t. The man had suffered, more than Noctis had. 

“One day Ifrit freed me, feeling the daemons in my body and my rotten soul. He had lost faith in humanity, so why should I keep mine? Ifrit’s anger equaled mine and we struck a deal. We had a common goal: destroy the Crystal. And I wanted to see the royal bloodline suffer. When I was free the first thing I did was catch up with the world. As it was , they left me to rot in Angelgard for fifty years. My brother was already dead, but he left behind a wife and two children. They said it was a tragic  _ accident _ .”

As it was when Ardyn told him a bit more. It had been Izunia's older son who had ended the life of his father, not able to endure how the man ruled. Insomnia was now a fortress, although much of Solheim’s technology was  _ lost. _ Ardyn revealed that his brother hid the secrets away or had burned them. The countryside fared worse, being ignored by the king and his Council. They had cared more for their own safety. Noctis only growled, because in his time it hadn’t been any different .  The Council pushing through the things which would benefit their own kind more than the people of Insomnia and Lucis.

“I watched the royal blood from the shadows over hundreds of years. I saw great kings and queens perish, who had done only the best for Lucis and there had been actual progress, which was every time destroyed when the child stepped up to rule, having developed their own mind. It was saddening and amusing at the same time. I journeyed through Eos, searching for the ruins of Solheim’s technology to gain some advantage should the time arise… Sometimes I thought I could still feel Gil’s presence somewhere. Only much later I discovered where he dwelled, actually it was in Regis’ father and his reign that they found a place named  _ The Tempering Grounds. _ Kings and queens were forbidden to enter… I stood before the entry, feeling Gilgamesh, but unable to reach him. I cursed the Astrals for forcing Gil into an immortal life as well.”

Noctis pressed a kiss to his forehead. “Maybe…” he started and thought his words through for a moment, “Maybe they have released him after you died, losing his purpose in the world. Both Chosen and Fallen King vanished from the world…”

“I hope you are right, Noctis. I dearly hope so,” Ardyn murmured, sighing. “The rest of my story his history. I gave my knowledge to Niflheim...became Chancellor, not out of a desire to gain power, but to get closer to your family. My brother had me erased from history, so no one would know who I truly was…”

“And you tried to make me hate you. Turned out pretty well, huh?” Noctis said and tried to lighten the mood. Ardyn leaned up, so he could face the young king, a small smile lifting up the corner of his mouth. Noctis touched his cheek, gently rubbing his thumb over the stubble and leaned in to kiss Ardyn, not chaste or light. It was a proper kiss, soon with teeth and tongue and Noctis pushed Ardyn back into the pillows, straddling the man’s hips. Ardyn sighed and wrapped his arms around Noctis’ neck, enjoying the weight of the Chosen One in his lap. It grounded him back to reality, the memories fading back into the fog. And he felt lighter, truly having shared his past with Noctis.

Noctis sat up too soon again and sighed, carding his fingers through Ardyn’s auburn mane, still amazed at how soft and silken it was. He could understand Ardyn now, why he had  done what he had done. Being erased from history by his own brother, who on top of that had betrayed him in the cruelest way possible. But nonetheless questions popped up in his mind and he didn’t know if he should ask them, now or later or altogether.

“What is on your mind, Noct? Your head is steaming quite strongly. Come on, tell old dear me what plagues you so much,” Ardyn teased and touched his cheek, trying to hide that he was still a bit shaken from that walk down memory lane. Noctis cheeks turned a light shade of pink.

“I wondered why you didn’t simply kill one of my ancestors if you hated our royal bloodline that much…” Noctis felt a bit stupid for asking this, because he could think of a reason for himself, but he wanted to hear it out of Ardyn’s mouth.

“Because I waited for the Chosen King of Light to be born. The one who would kill me and free me from my eternal purgatory. I watched you grow up, Noctis. From that cute little toddler, who was so shy , to the handsome King. We...met once before Galdin, but I surmised that you simply had forgotten this and that after you were so clingy!”

The teasing returned half way back into Ardyn's voice as he spoke and he looked at Noctis with such a fond expression that the Chosen avoided his gaze and looked to the side, too stunned to speak for the moment.

They had met before?

**Author's Note:**

> the last dialogue between them is a direct translation from the German Version in the game. Hope it is appreciated
> 
> You can talk to me on my twitter [crolivsart](https://twitter.com/crolivsart)


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